With These Hands

It is not by mistake that God gave us the largest organ of our body-- the skin-- as the means through which we receive the sense of touch.  With unbelievable sensitivity and accuracy, we can know instantly when someone or something has touched us.  Sometimes it is a pleasurable feeling, but sometimes it produces discomfort or pain.  So sensitive is our skin and the nerves that provide our sense of touch that even drawing near to certain things sometimes creates a feeling, an activation of the sense of touch.  If our hand happens to pass over a pre-heated burner on the stove, we instantly sense the heat radiating upward and are warned to draw our hand away, lest we get burned.  Just the gentle brush of someone we love walking close to us can elicit the sensation of touch and activate an emotional response in our heart and mind.  Touch is a powerful tool of communication.

In our homes, we can use the sense of touch to convey many messages.  There are countless items with which we come into contact every day.  Some produce a pleasurable sensation and others create discomfort. For most of us we would surely affirm that we tend to avoid those things that produce discomfort for us.  We know that stroking the soft fur of a kitten is pleasurable and we enjoy that activity, but when that kitty's claws are exposed and we see an aggressive stance in the animal we draw back with the knowledge that a scratch from an angry cat is no fun.  It is a pleasure to slip into a soft, fluffy bathrobe and slippers to lounge for a few hours, but not nearly so much fun to pull on our heavy workboots and a rough woolen sweater to tackle the yard work that needs to be done.  Touch conveys a message.

Down through the years of raising my children, I can remember all the times I held them in my arms, cradling them to sleep.  Sometimes a bad dream or a cramping tummy would prevent them from resting quietly.  They would always come seeking Mommy for comfort and the touch only a Mother can give.  When they were  infants, I would cuddle them close to my chest and gently pat their diapered behinds to assure them all was well in their world.  Safe in my warm embrace, they always drifted off to sleep quietly.  As they grew and their discomforts arose, I often addressed those (whether physical or emotional) by softly rubbing their arms, neck, and head.  That act of gently touching them conveyed the message that I not only cared about their suffering, but I also sought to ease it and bring some level of comfort back into their life.  Our middle daughter was plagued with migraine headaches in her teenage years, and they were truly a source of physical anguish for her.  It didn't take long for me to realize that at the onset of one of those episodes, if I could dim the lighting in her room, have her lie down on her bed, and then gently stroke her arms, legs, face, and head, I could often help her slip into a state of peacefulness that enabled her to just drift off to sleep and allow the headache to pass.  To this day, when one of my children (all of whom are now fully grown and with families of their own) is in my presence and begins to feel ill or upset, they come to me asking, "Mom, will you rub me?"  with their arm outstretched in the anticipation of the calm reassurance that my touch can offer.

When Jesus Christ was incarnated (became flesh and blood) He did so that He might fully identify with us as human beings, complete with every ache, pain, trauma, upset, joy, and sorrow that we know.  His touch carried with it the tremendous power to heal and change lives forever.  Those around Him sensed that power and clamored to His person for the purpose of receiving that mighty, life-changing touch.  Even brushing the hem of his robe was powerful enough to facilitate total healing.  (Read the story of the woman with an issue of blood in Luke 8:43-48.)  Love flowed from our Lord in a never-ending stream and His care for mankind was expressed through His touch.

Using the power of touch can diffuse a volatile situation.  For example, if you need to have a discussion with someone that you're pretty sure will cause some mental or emotional discomfort in them, or you, or both, try asking them to sit near you and take their hand in yours before you begin to speak.  As you begin the conversation, gently stroke the back of their hand and hold it with a gentle firmness in your own so they will not draw their hand away.  You'll find the response you receive will be rewarding.  If you and someone you love are engaged in an argument, try reaching out and gently grasping that other person's hand.  Softly pat the back of their hand or stroke their lower arm as you speak.  In moments, the anger will begin to soften, the words will come with less venom, and the argument will change into a calm discussion that leads to a mutually beneficial end.

I have sat at the bedside of many dying individuals within the span of my life.  Regardless of their past lives or present experiences, each and every one of them longed for me to hold their hand gently, stroke their arm, and convey the message of love to them through my touch.  In many cases, as the love and compassion of the Holy Spirit has flowed through me,  I have been able to ease their anxiety and bring them a sense of calm reassurance that has allowed them to pass into eternity peacefully.

In our homes we can use the sense of touch to help us create a loving, warm, and inviting environment for those we care about.  During the harsh months of winter, a snuggly afghan and a soft pillow resting on the sofa become an instant comfort-giving pair.  An electric blanket can be used to warm the bed on a cold  night.  A fire in the fireplace gives warmth and comfort , and enjoying its heat may help elicit some very meaningful conversations within a family.

Perhaps one of the most effective ways we can communicate our love to others is to simply reach out and gently touch them as we pass by.  Ruffling my grandsons' hair, brushing the golden tresses of my granddaughter, massaging my husband's aching back at the end of a busy work day, rubbing analgesic cream into the arthritic hands of my mother... all these examples of touch have repeatedly said "I love you" to those whom I value.

Not long ago, my middle daughter (Somer) said this to me:  "Mom, some day when you are no longer here with us, the thing I will most remember about you are your soft, gentle hands and all the times when you rubbed away my cares."  That statement brought tears to my eyes and a deep joy to my heart.  What a wonderful way to be remembered.  I thank my Lord for His touch on my life that has allowed me to touch others with love and compassion each day I live.

"When one of the Pharisees invited Jesus to have dinner with him, he went to the Pharisee’s house and reclined at the table.   A woman in that town who lived a sinful life learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee’s house, so she came there with an alabaster jar of perfume.  As she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them."

(Luke 7:36-38)